I’ve realized I have a number of ways that I ask for help. Sometimes, I’m very straightforward:
“Hey, I’m feeling really depressed right now. Can you please listen to me/talk to me/hold me/let me cry on your shoulder/make me laugh?”
Other times, I’m less clear. It might be a text message asking a friend, “Hey—you around?” or I might apologize for no discernible reason. I might say, “I’ll be fine.” What that really means is “I’ll be fine eventually, but I’m not right now.”
I’m not sure why I have so much trouble asking for help sometimes. I guess I’m always afraid of being a burden, and when I’m feeling low, that fear intensifies. I feel like the clearer I can be, the easier it is for my support team and for me, so I’m going to try to work on that.
I think it helps to have trust in my support team—to trust that not only will they be there for me when they can, but that they’ll let me know if they can’t be there for me. That they won’t help me while resenting it; that I won’t “use up” their patience to the point where they abandon me forever. I’m also wanting to try to reach out to more people, so that if someone tells me they can’t help me right then, I have someone else to go to. Lots to work on!