“I need to exercise to work on some of this,” says a somewhat overweight friend, grabbing at his middle. Immediately, my insides twist and I feel ashamed.
Doesn’t he know that I have the same problem?
Isn’t he trying to tell me that it’s good to lose weight; that I should lose weight?
Doesn’t he see that he’s telling me I’m bad?
…
Or maybe it’s not about me. Maybe it’s not a value judgment. Maybe a statement about his size is just a statement about his size; not an indictment of himself or of me.
But how do I convince myself of that?